called by a new name

Names are significant. We see time and again in the word of God that names are so important that the unchanging God does change the names of those he has made. He gives new names. He does this for many reasons but there seems to be a recreating of creation that is at the heart of the new name. In Isaiah 62 God renames Zion to Hephzibah. This name change is the result of God changing the way He feels about Zion and He now relates to the people in a new way and so they need a new name. The act of naming is one that God gives to us in Genesis. He actually allows Adam to get all crazy and start naming stuff. God literally brings all the stuff He made and He shows the stuff to Adam and lets Adam name the stuff. Again, I say who is this God?
So I am rambling and all this is to set up the whole point which is naming stuff is pretty serious. For me naming stuff is so critical that I sit in fear before the Lord whenever I undertake the activity. And so the series of names that I went through before naming Noah Grace was daunting. She is His after all, and not just in a flippant "God owns all things" kind of way but in the for real she is His and I need to hear Him and get this right so He won't need to change her name kind of way. I want to make sure I name His girl the name He wants to call her. 
So as I sat in prayer the night before she was born I was calling out to the Father in just the desperate I need to know the name kind of way, I sat with the Word and flipped through page after page and name after name.
He spoke to me so clearly on Tuesday night. There had been several prophetic words that God was changing her name and so I wanted to hear the new name. There was the dream that she would be named Grace and that weighed heavy on my heart. I prayed long about whether or not that was supposed to be the first name. Then there was a word that spoke of my confusion on the name and that perhaps there was a new name to come forth. And so this one stirred me. So should she be named Maranatha, I asked. That went nowhere and I love the meaning of the name, but name meanings have not been important since I was saved, only before. Then I was asking if Hephzibah was the name. Again the meaning moves me but what a crazy name.
And so I was sitting on Noah but that was her name all along so I was troubled because there was nothing new happening with the name So I began to read everything I had read when I chose the name seven months ago.
Noah means rest. Not really all that impressive. But Noah, wow, what a man of faith. He did exactly what God asked. He did not add or take away. He just did exactly as God asked. God told him to build and Ark so he did. Think about it. God told him it would rain. We always waltz right on past that. God had not even created rain at that point. There was no such thing and yet Noah never even asked for an explanation. Ah such a follower, such a disciple. Add to that the truth that everyone on earth was so fouled that God was hitting the reset button and the only one found worthy was Noah. God looked at Noah and declared him the only righteous man on earth. That is something. This is God we are talking about. God does not lower His standards and function in a culture of relativism. That is what man does. God says this is righteousness, end of story. Be it or be dead with the rest of this world.
But where does this new name come in because all this I already knew when I named her in the summer. And then I read 2nd Peter  2:5, "if he did not spare the ancient world, but preserved Noah, a herald of righteousness, with seven others, when he brought a flood upon the world of the ungodly". It goes on and makes a cool sentence about the standards of the Father but what matters here is that Peter calls Noah the "herald of righteousness." Now that is something I did not know. The name is new. Noah is the herald of righteousness, the one who cries out, the one who continues to teach the truth of the Father without compromise.(so much like JTB. And we all know where I am on that topic) He teaches righteousness. And so Noah Grace it is. Because there is no compromise in the message. His grace is sufficient. It is sufficient enough to see us walk out His righteousness. In Noah there was no compromise. This is the one man who God chose to start again with after He killed the rest of creation. We would do well to understand this. We would do well to know what Noah knew.

Jesus + Nothing

I am not in a storm. But I am in a season of costly discipleship. The Father is stripping me. He is making me His again. It does not look what we think it will look like. I am unafraid but I am in a place that begins to make my reflection look strange. I am in a place where I must ask is it in the Word. I am in a place where I must ask does it look like what He looks like?
I am done being relative and I am finished with peace and safety. I am putting on my remembering hat. I am adding nothing to and taking nothing away. I am reminded of Michael Eaton and His constant declaration of "Jesus + nothing." I want that and that can only be had in Him. There is a reason why David always cried out for the Father to be His refuge. We only need refuge when we are running or hiding or returning or abiding? We don't need refuge when we are under the illusion that all is well. See I've made a discovery? Nothing is well apart from Him. He is our strong tower, He is our refuge. We sing it all the while crying peace and safety. In Psalm 71 it says, "Be my strong refuge to which I may resort continually; You have given the commandment to save me, for You are my rock and my fortress." I have had peace and safety and it is an illusion. It is the strong delusion sent by the enemy. It tricks us into a Christianity that looks like the world looks. It is a Christianity that is filled with the glorification of me and not Him. He is reminding me that I do not want that. He is reminding me that I signed up to glorify Him. I am told that this revelation is going to cost me everything; And that when this season is done there will be very few standing with me, arms raised, declaring, "Jesus + Nothing"... Maybe, no one, I'm told. They say I'm going to lose everything but Him. We will see.

More Levite nonsense

I try to mind my own business. I really do hope to someday find something fluffy and nice that God will speak to me. It would be nice for everyone involved, myself included. If only I could just teach something else, talk about some other trait. If I could lay off all this set apartness and this righteousness and this He's coming again stuff.
And so who knows why God thought it would be a super cool idea for me to read Joshua again. In fact I exasperated, "not Joshua again." something like that. But today I had to hit chapter thirteen and there begins a bunch of crazy talk about which tribe gets what land. There is all this mumbo jumbo about where who will live and how that land is not super cool or how there are too many hills or not enough hills. Or too many trees or not enough trees. It goes on and on. And then there it is in 13:14 "Only the tribe of Levi he had given no inheritance; the sacrifices of the Lord God of Israel made by fire are their inheritances." I'm thinking pretty cool. Sacrifices by fire and all. I mean they get the sacrifices of the Lord made by fire. That is pretty legit. In verse 33 we get a repeat, "To the tribe of Levi Moses had given no inheritance; the Lord God of Israel was their inheritance." In chapter 18 we are told, "But the Levites have no part among you, for the priesthood of the Lord is their inheritance."
So here I am and I am blown away by this truth. The Levites inherit the Lord and everyone else is convinced that the better deal was in the land. The other tribes are stoked to get the land even though for the most part the land sucks. It's got all these little flaws. Oh how I want to cry out " I know all about that land thing." Cuz I do. I've got land, well at least I have this house in Brea. And it's pretty cool. I mean it's not the best house but it's a house. And I have what most people would agree is the craziest most perfect work schedule. I mean I am home by noon on a daily basis. My inheritance in Brea seems pretty good, all things considered.
But I am unsettled. This does not feel like my inheritance. This feels like something else. This feels like maybe I got the answer wrong, like maybe I took all the wrong classes in college which is funny because I took all the classes. Because the truth is everyone thinks the Levites were robbed but they inherited the Lord God of Israel. They serve and rely on Him alone. And they have no home and yet they will want for nothing because they are claimed by the most high God. See, that right there is what all of this is about. We spend so much time asking and seeking for our inheritance of good health, financial security, and peace and safety. Oh the list goes on. But the only inheritance we really need is the Lord. He is our inheritance because of the work of the cross. For me it is settled. We are Levites from the day we say yes. The only problem is that we really like the land and all that other cool stuff. Don't get me wrong the Land is cool. But I think I might want to trade it all away for all of Him. Like I need a readjustment of perspective. Oh those Levites. Truth be told most of them probably felt pretty ripped off with the whole no land deal. This God. He is my beloved and I am His. He is fearfully wonderful and I am just afraid. I want more. At least I'm pretty sure I want more.

The world does not know us

What am I supposed to do with words that explain my daily reality. How do we begin to explain what it feels like to be so completely unknown, to be a foreigner in the middle of my own city. We are not of this world. It is cliche' and it is painfully true. "Beloved what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God! Therefore the world does not know us, because it did not know Him." (1 John 3:1) Here is the truth. If the world gets your God, you are probably telling the story wrong.
What do we do with a God that does not exaggerate? What do we do with a God who is merciful and jealous and mighty and humble? What do we do with a God who asks for our everything, who says go and sin no more? Oh this God, He so captivates my heart that I forever feel unworthy and at all times I have this deep longing that I cannot explain even to myself. I want to run, to just run around and yell at whoever will listen. I want to stand on a street corner and hold a sign that says, "You have no idea." That's what I want to do because it is how I feel at all times. I see people and I don't even know where to begin. I want to make t-shirts and buttons. I want to just stand there with tape over my mouth and just point to my sign over and over as I wave. Just this endless pointing and waving thing. That is what I want to do there on the corner with my sign.
Oh that I could explain this upside down kingdom where the point isn't self actualization. How do you explain a kingdom forged in weakness, a kingdom founded on prayer and fasting. How do you explain Jesus to a world that does not know Him. They stare at us with empty, blank stares. They have decided that He is not real or even worse they have decided that He does not care.
And then it all makes perfect sense as John nicely puts it. The world does not know us because they do not know Him. See, it is a rubik's cube only way worse. It's a catch 22 only way more tragic because eternity is at stake. They cannot know us because they cannot know Him. And we can tell them about Him with all our cool fancy tricks and we can make it way easier for them to understand (because God is so complicated?) Heck we can settle for raised hands during dark ministry times. Why bother with the formality. We have almost declared everyone saved if they will at least admit He was a real person.
The truth is that He is other than. This God is not like us. The truth is that the world does not know Him and they cannot know Him until they are no longer of the world. He makes us new (set's us free) and then we open our eyes and then we know Him. We finally see see Him. It's the matrix without the karate and the plug that goes into our brain. Whoa, I know kung-fu. Something like that. I wave, I point, I hold my sign. "You have no idea." It's all I want to say, ever.

This is a hard saying.

In John 6:35-69 Jesus is walking with his disciples and really explaining who He is. He is walking with a large crew of people who He just did the very cool feed the masses thing with. Sure, they are all followers now that He has given them food to eat. And isn't this just like people to follow whoever is keeping them fed. We are just so empty like this. If you feed us we will follow. And Jesus, being Jesus, knows who is following for the food, and He knows who is following for the bread of life. See it's not the same and this is what Jesus is teaching on that fateful day when He reduces His crew from thousands back to just about the 12.
On that day He reminds them that He is the food and that He is the living water, "For my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink." And there goes His mega church. The followers begin to look at each other and say, "This is a hard saying." Oh and how things never change with the unchanging God. Because at the end of the day He has so many hard sayings. This is His truth. He is all together unlike us. If His sayings are not hard we are probably not hearing Him.

And so what is the point? The point is in verse 67 and 68. Jesus looks at the 12 and He says, "Do you want to go away as well?" Such an important truth about Jesus. He is unafraid of these moments. In verse 64 Jesus says, "But there are some of you who do not believe." And then John explains that "Jesus knew from the beginning who those were who did not believe." Here is the hard word. There are those who follow but do not believe and Jesus knows it. In Matthew 22 and 23 we are told that many will prophesy, cast out demons and do good works in the name of Jesus. We are then told that He will say I never knew you. So Jesus is not afraid to ask if they want to leave as well because Jesus understands that when He reveals all of who He is, most will say no thank you. Oh, this Jesus we follow. Oh, to know more of who you are oh, to love you rightly.

But alas we arrive at verse 68 where Peter says, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and we have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God." Peter, who will make mistakes, knows the truth. There is no other one but this one. He gets so many things that we need to get. He gets that Jesus is Lord. He gets that believing and knowing are different and he gets that Jesus is God. Peter is witness to the truth that there must be more than this. Peter has seen followers come and go and what he knows is that believing in Jesus and knowing Him are way different. And what Peter knows is that believers will come and go and that there are no guarantees and he doesn't know much about once saved always saved but he knows that this Jesus is the eternal God and for Peter that is good enough. There is no turning back.

Who then is this?

In Mark 4:35-41 we witness the story of Jesus calming the seas. It begins simply enough. Jesus says, "let us go across to the other side." By verse 37 we see that the winds have come and that the sea is raging. We learn that the boat is filling with water. By verse 38 the disciples are running about in a panic and they wake Jesus up with what seems to be nothing short of an accusation, "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?" And that right there is at the heart of what is on my mind.

These are His people, His chosen ones. They are with Him and they have said yes. We know they have left things behind, they have traveled with Him and have seen what He can do. And when the storm comes they are expectant, they are quite sure that He will arise and wave His hands and do something cool. After all, He has been doing one very cool thing after another. They are not in doubt in this moment, but  they are wondering if He is going to bother to save them all.
We know how the story ends. Jesus wakes up tells the winds to calm their crazy selves down and then He turns to the disciples and teaches them. It is the teaching they always struggle with. He tells them, "Why are you still afraid? Have you still no faith?" They walk away and say to each other, "who is this, that even the wind and the sea obey Him?" Indeed who is this man?

So much to see here. They have been walking intimately with Him and they are blown away that the elements obey Jesus. This is what they seem to take away from this moment. They have seen Him cast out demons and heal some sick people. They have seen Him forgive sins, (which is just a whole different point to ponder.) They have seen more in these first few chapters of Mark than most of us will see in our lifetime and yet they are still perplexed, they still go to bed at night and wonder who the heck they are following. You see, they are convinced it is the Messiah (sort of) but really they just don't know. And yet they continue to follow. They are Christ followers, for real. And the Messiah is constantly teaching them and they can't quite process His crazy stories and these signs and wonders.

But that night, on that boat Jesus reveals to them something that they let pass by, but it is something that we must not miss. He is not scolding them for having no faith after the sea is calm. He is telling them something way bigger. He is telling them That He is the Messiah, that His word is eternal, true. Where? Return to verse 35. Jesus says, "Let us go across to the other side." You see when Jesus says that we are going to the other side, He means it. The other side is a done deal. There is no maybe. If Jesus says that something is going to happen we can rest assured that it will happen. He is unshakeable and unmoveable. He is faithful to the end. On that night Jesus said to His followers, "we are going to the other side." And He meant it. This is where we need to settle it in our hearts that He will see us through all things, that there is nothing that He cannot do. When the disciples awakened Jesus in a panic He calmed the storm, but really He wanted them to know that storm or no storm we are going to reach the other side. He chastises them because He wants them to know that the storm doesn't need calming. The other side is coming. It is coming because He said so. Our faith has to be placed firmly in the Jesus said it, so it will be, place in our heart. In His kindness, He will sometimes calm the storm, but He wants us to find that place where we know the other side will be reached, even while He does nothing to calm the storm. This is where our faith meets our Messiah.

Snakes in the bread

Oh the things that catch my eye. In Luke 11 Jesus tells a parable about going to a friend for a friend. In this parable what is needed is some bread for a friend who is hungry. So friend A goes to friend B to get bread for friend C. It is late and there is a lot of door knocking and friend B is irritated but eventully gives friend A the bread. And all this bread giving occurs not because friend B is in the mood to give bread but because friend A just won't stop knocking. And all this is a picture of our Lord who at times answers prayer because of persistence. But here is what I have been thinking about for a week. When Jesus wraps up this parable He says, "What father among you, if his son asks for a fish will instead of a fish give him a serpent; or if he asks for an egg will give him a scorpion? If you then who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him?"

What to do with a God who does give snakes as a gift? While Jesus tells us that the Father will give us more of the Spirit (very nice) He does not tell us that God will not give us snakes when we ask for bread. The truth is that God does give snakes instead of bread. In Numbers 21 we find an amazing story where God sends a "gift" to the Israelites.  This "gift" from God is snakes that bite their heels. You see the Isralites were tired of walking around getting nowhere and they were bored of eating food from the sky everyday. And so they started to complain. They began to say things like "We loathe this worthless food." They actually were longing for the good old days in Egypt were the food was good and different. And so "The Lord sent fiery serpents among the people and they bit the people, so that many people of Israel died." There you go the Father sends snakes when the people were asking for different food. The story only gets crazier as Moses asks God to get rid of the snakes that bite and kill. God refuses to get rid of the snakes but He does have Moses make a bronze serpent and He has him put the bronze serpent on a pole so that whenever one of the people is biten by a snake they can go look at the pole and be healed. How completely weird is that?

So what is the point? Well there are many points here.  But the biggest point is that we must wrap our heads around this truth. Our God is good. And so when He sends snakes He is sending a good gift. His gift of snakes turned the people back to Him. So often we want to have a God who looks like us. We want a God who heals terminal diseases and sends us a new car. (And sometimes He does that) What we don't want is a God who sends snakes. And because of this we have stopped teaching this God. We pretend He doesn't exist. And so when He does send snakes we are left in utter shock. Beyond that unbelievers are even more shocked because nobody has mentioned this God. We are so busy telling them that God loves them that we have forgotten to tell them that He loves them so much that He has a snake for them. We are not sure of this God because we don't really believe in Him because we have created a God that behaves with our definition of Good. For us good always seems nice and polite. Our definition of good fails to take into account righteousness and eternity. Our good is woefully short of His.  We question God when He sends snakes. And yet the same God who sends snakes sent a snake pole. The snakes are going to keep coming until He returns. But He sent His Son and had Him put upon a pole. And when we have revelation of this act we realize the snakes are good. Because the snakes force us to the snake pole. And only through this process is there hope for eternal life, for redemption.